I am sorry… I couldn’t help myself when I saw this on Freelancer.com.

Screen Shot 2014-05-01 at 11.15.05

I assumed the project budget must be an error…. 250M-750M must be what he meant, so I put in a provisional bid of $277,777,777 although I would need to get the other shareholders to agree before I started the work…

If it was indeed a budget of $250, I have some questions for “Deadovation” which I think is the handle for the guy that wants it built.

  • Is the power supply for computers like these a chargeable extra? That picture was posted in 2010 by the way… we have grown quite a bit since then.
  • In an average day, Twitter says there are 500,000 million Tweets. In the same 24 hour period, Majestic typically crawls FOUR TIMES as many web pages and then does a calculation on about 700 billion pages. Do I need to also build the crawlers and the data centers for the distributed crawlers for $250 or is that a chargeable extra?
  • So far, Majestic has crawled 53,110,348,345 MB of data. Which hard drive would he suggest I put the data on when I build it for him? How would he like the data delivered? Container lorry?
  • Is this project asking me to copy another project, or are the “few extra bells and whistles” going to be enough to stop the lawyers?
  • Is PHP the right software language for interrogating a data set of this size?

If you are going to build something on the Internet, I have two honest to god bits of advice. The first is to innovate, not replicate. The second is to understand at least the basics of the technical challenge you hope to overcome.

In the meantime – if you want the REAL THING, it costs from £30/$50 a month per user. I think that is probably the wiser option.

Categories: Commentary


Gordon Campbell · May 1, 2014 at 11:36 am

I’d quite like a ripoff of Google, budget is £1000.

Geoff Jackson · May 1, 2014 at 11:36 am

I’ve seen worse, once someone wanted a clone of eBay for $500. There are many other ‘as ridiculous’ jobs on these low quality freelancing websites I’ve come across before.

The worrying thing is, plenty of “freelancers” will bid on this, one will even win the job. Suffice to say, Majestic hasn’t got anything to worry about of course.

Dean Cruddace · May 1, 2014 at 12:29 pm

Can I have a replica of Google+ please?

After alcohol & utility bills I am left with £7.38p/month, will that cover it?

Great response Dixon.

jamesfx2 · May 1, 2014 at 12:58 pm

You want a replica of eBay? AuctionPress, WP-Auction. You want a replica of Google+? BuddyPress and tons of other WordPress themes/plugins.

Are they any good? You’d have to pay a severe amount of money to get anything better and can be modified/enriched. But they’re okay.

I wanted to setup a dating site for SEOs for April Fools but no-one fancied spending $55 on Sweet Date.

Sadly there is no WordPress theme that replicates either Majestic or Google.

    admin · May 1, 2014 at 1:29 pm

    Hehe. An SEO Dating site! Do it… do it now James! We can match buyer’s expectations with SEO ability! Then we can report any match below a quality threshold to Google 🙂

Peter Nikolow · May 1, 2014 at 1:24 pm

Typical bid for Freelancer.com site.

I saw before few years ago quote for Yahoo.com (whole site and all services for $1000) and i can’t be impressed anymore.

    admin · May 1, 2014 at 1:27 pm

    Haha 🙂
    That’s funny Peter. Now I see it, one of my dev guys says it is not the first time someone has asked for a clone of us. I figure that May Day is a big Spring Fever festival in many parts of the world. That must have been what started it 🙂

admin · May 2, 2014 at 7:27 am

Update: The project is cancelled. Probably wise.

Robert · May 6, 2014 at 3:29 pm

Forget about the budget, see the delivery time! 10h hours? really? Someone actually believes they can do it in 10 hours? lol!

Jay Patel · May 12, 2014 at 7:25 am

Glad to see the project is cancelled. You may often find such silly projects on elance and other freelancer platform. In fact, I also posted a stupid project like this (a small one though) and quickly realized that it’s impossible to get the project done at such a low price.
Surprisingly, many people bid for the project. #sarcasm

Atamyrat Hangeldiyev · May 29, 2014 at 8:03 pm

Hahaha, funny post dear Dixon 😀

Alex Zacharov · March 6, 2015 at 1:23 am

that is indeed hilarious!

KafeinCo · May 27, 2015 at 3:58 pm

Hehehe ! (Y)

Hasan Günal · May 29, 2015 at 5:28 am

haha very good :d

Mustafa · June 28, 2015 at 9:29 pm

Hahaha 🙂 Funny.

Plan A Link Web Design · July 24, 2015 at 8:18 pm

Haha this is very funny post. It goes to show the level that people mis understand when it comes to creating websites! Keep up the good work 🙂

Berat BAK · August 21, 2015 at 1:08 pm

hahahaha 😀 if you sell this script to 250 or 750$ i want this 8)

come on thats laugh 🙂

Seo Danismani · October 3, 2015 at 12:59 pm

Thanks for article dixon, we love you.

seo paketleri · November 8, 2015 at 3:23 pm

thanks for this great article 🙂

vodafone fiber internet · December 15, 2015 at 11:00 am

hahah very good 😀

resim kursu · December 31, 2015 at 4:14 pm

happy 😀

hafif beton · February 12, 2016 at 10:17 am

thanks 🙂

Kollu sandalyeler · February 12, 2016 at 10:18 am

beatiful verry good

Skrotpræmie · March 10, 2016 at 12:09 am

that is indeed hilarious!

Skrotpræmie · March 10, 2016 at 12:10 am

thanks for this great article 🙂

instagram takipçi kasma · April 18, 2016 at 11:41 am

Really funny thanks for share 🙂

Matbaa Ankara · May 10, 2016 at 12:02 pm

Hahahaha 750$ its really ? 😀

Katalog Bask? · May 10, 2016 at 12:03 pm

This great. Because i can buy this script 😀

Matbaa · June 10, 2016 at 10:28 am

Hahaha, funny post thank 🙂

indirimx · September 6, 2016 at 10:34 pm

thanks for this great article

seo paketleri · August 27, 2017 at 6:48 pm

thank you great share

Link Love - April 2014 · September 7, 2015 at 1:01 pm

[…] Last of all lets finish on a funny… […]

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